Dudes... let’s keep it real. Everyone one of us at one time or another has been guilty of smelly balls. While some of the more liberal western and northeastern parts of America still consider parole some 20 years after committing such a horrid offense, most times in your life, this is a one and done capital OFFENSE-(IVNESS). One strike and you are OUT.
So... what causes your beloved man gems to become an odiferous torture chamber for unsuspecting visitors in the first place? More importantly, how can you prevent smelly balls?
6 Tips To Prevent Smelly Balls
1. Wash Your Balls, Dude!
As obvious as it sounds, some Dudes spend too much time listening to Ashton Kutcher (A-list movie stars are allowed to have smelly balls and just about everything else in the world, Dude!) Wash your balls every day! If you work out or sweat a lot, make sure to wash them multiple times a day.
Why? One word. Bacteria. Our balls sweat, and the bacteria in sweat has an odor that generally does not have anyone lining up to say, “I wanna be all over THAT.” So the first rule of no more smelly balls is "Wash thy sack, Dude!"
2. Decrease Sugar Intake
High-glycemic foods can change the chemical composition of your sweat. Sugary sweat meets up with the bacteria on your skin, and they form a brand-new relationship known as body odor. Also, keep an eye on your alcohol intake and red meat/spicy food consumption—they tend to intensify existing body odors.
3. Avoid Tight Underwear
Simple enough, Dude? When you suffocate your sack, payback is a b!tch. Tight underwear creates extra sweat which becomes a breeding ground for the bacteria, causing your Dude parts to become a very smelly, uninviting place. I highly recommend getting some suitable, breathable underwear such as boxers to prevent moisture build up and prevent your family jewels from the dreaded smelly crotch syndrome.
4. Dry Your Balls, Properly
One of the biggest mistakes most guys make is getting dressed while their twig and berries are still wet. When you don’t properly dry your balls, you have damp, moist balls that are an open invitation for bacteria that create swamp sack. Long story short—dry your balls! Use a towel, air dryer, close friend (or even an enemy who has a mutual agreement not to bite) but dry your balls before you get dressed.
5. Maintain Your Sack
"Welcome to the Jungle" was a hit Guns N' Roses song but it isn’t the type of greeting most of your "guests" will appreciate. (Don’t kid yourself if you think growing your own "rainforest" down there is your way of saving the environment.) You don’t need to go "au naturel" but remember that more hair south of the border means more sweat and bacteria, which is a one-way ticket to smelly balls, so keep them groomed.
6. Ball-Wash (Advanced Ball Hygiene)
For the dudes who want to have the best smelling balls on the block, there's no better option than getting yourself some specialized ball hygiene products. These products are fairly new to the market but growing in popularity at an insane rate. Which is no surprise considering how lonely your balls can become if you experience crotch funk.
Pro-Tip: When shopping for a legitimate ball-wash, make sure the product uses activated charcoal as one of the main ingredients. Activated charcoal absorbs ball odors, toxins and bacteria, meaning it will do the job right.